18 Finding the Right One
court (v) / courtship / courting
arranged marriages
(love marriage)
“Christmas cake”
engagement / to be engaged (to)
blind date
speed dating

How many differences are there between Pat’s and Akane’s courtships?
Looking at these differences, what might we infer about the different nature and expectations of marriage in each of their cultures?
How important do you think love is in a marriage? What other things do you think are important?
How are boyfriend-girlfriend and husband-wife relationships different? Do you see big differences, or are the differences not so significant?
How common is it in Japan to marry someone that you don’t love?
What experience have you had or heard of regarding o-miai? (parents, relatives, media, etc.)
Describe what you think your wedding will be like (if you’re planning to get married some day)?
How do people know or decide on “the right one”?
Where are good (and bad) places to meet a future spouse? Why? (See the textbook, p. 80)
Describe your ideal mate. (See p. 81 in the textbook.) Discuss with your group.
What are some of your “deal-breakers” when it comes to a prospective  partner?
How much is too much to spend on a wedding?
Do you know the story of how your parents met?
How would you like your marriage to be the same as your parents’? How would you like it to be different?
How do you think marriage and the family will change in the future?
Do you have a preferred “type”? Bring a picture! (Or several!)
Other experiences, stories, research...

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